Human being never stops growing. Be it physically, mentally or emotionally. From the moment we crawled out into life, weighing averagely 3 kg, to become a full grown adult. Yes, we are still growing, even only subtly.
We grow from throwing tantrums to being able to hold and control your emotions. Most of us, anyway. Mentally and emotionally, we are groomed by our environment, by our parents, by our friends, and by our social circumstances. And as for me, I would say that I am finally happy with my own growth.
I just spent a week with Priya and one whole month with Zen and Yee Pei. I must say, despite the time apart, it felt like we were never separated at all. Spending time with old friend brings some good fresh air back from the past. Zen's first reaction when she saw me was,"You've changed". I must admit, yes I have changed.
After dissecting events after events, this is what I noticed:
1. I no longer consider parties and getting drunk are the only ways to have fun and the only thing that is cool. I do not mean I used to think that getting drunk was cool!! It's the feeling of being embarrassed if those things in the past would ever happen to me now.
Last time, I could just brush it off and say,"Ergh.. it happens". But now, I could just dig a hole and never come out till the apocalypse.
Right now, I want myself to behave a certain way because I believe how you behave portrays a certain personality and responsibility. Right now, I care more for people to see me as a responsible woman instead of a party head.
2. I am more objective when it comes to certain situation and to listening to other people's problems. Yeah, shit happens and it could happen to anybody. What I've been trying to do is to try to control my temper and see the problems from different angle, instead of just focusing on what I think should happen or should be done. Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda moments are not constructive.
3. I learn to voice out more. Say what I mean when I mean it..
Whilst hanging out with old friends brought out my old self, it also made realize that I've grown. and I'm liking it. Finally....
